5 potentially great things about the next generation of games consoles

I was originally going to write a witty, yet sarcastic article on how superfluous the coming generation of consoles is however the last week with GTA V has made me reconsider... a little. Join me as I doth the 'top hat of positive thought' and mull over the coming generation of consoles.

(GTA) 5 things Rockstar did or somethin'

1. Bewbs!

The year is 2013 and we have the 57th sandbox crime game this year, the immense GTA 5 or GTA V if your a Roman... whatever.

Like all the other sandbox gangster games this game features strip clubs... or as I have come to call them...

'HOLY FUCK WHAT IS THAT THING!?'

Rockstar have been making interactive murder n' drive games for a while now and strippers have featured since 'GTA: Flinstones City' or somethin'... you'd think by now they would have perfected digital strippers....

2.  The 'N word'!

Google images, you never fail to amaze.

Oh my word, I feel like I have been skull-loved by Dr Dre and Snoopy Dog, their 'N words' juice pouring out my nose.

I am pretty sure Micheal Bay wrote this thing, as it is about as natural as a minstrel at a KKK kegger.

... I hate Micheal Bay.

3. The soundtrack is awesome

Phil Collins returns!... and a few others...

4. Pedo beards! 

First thing my crew got were pedo beards and serial killer glasses... I need a flasher jacket to finish off my holy trinity of sexual predator attire. Our gang motto will be...

'Killing you is just the start of the horrors we shall unleash'

Thank you http://venturebeat.com/

5. Its a very good game.

Well done Kotaku on the best picture ever.

Joking aside, the game is great. By no means am I remotely near finishing it but this is one of those rare occasions where the hype is justified.

I intend on reviewing it when we have beaten the story mode.


I just watched my wife attend a strip club with Micheal, feel up a stripper and then get laid at her flea pit house.

My wife just did it with a stripper in front of me.

Dumpster Diving 8/11/13

Even this image was recycled

This is a first for me... I am well versed in re-purposing junk to suit my needs, I have rewired LCD screens to build portables, I have used superfluous controllers to make controllers for emulators, I have even built my own MAME cabinet for approximately £0...

I have never climbed into a bin to scavenge games consoles.

Top 10 things I love about modern games [Anton's Opinion]

1. Its the Goddamn future

When I was an itty-bitty gamer, me and my mates would dream of the amazing things to come in our gaming future. Now I live in the future and holy shit-balls did things escalate quick.

Top 10 things I hate about modern games [Anton's Opinion]

1. The colour gray/brown is everywhere

Take a look out your window right now... Go on, I'll wait...

Notice anything? It's autumn in the UK and that means everything is gray. Infact most days the UK looks gray, which is why I find the current crop of 'realistic' modern games a miserable place to be.

Why play games? Escapism and entertainment.

Why escape the real world to find an equally shitty one in your game but with more violence?

Talking of crappy/lazy art styles...

Girls and Gaming [Michelle's Opinion]

Right indulge me my opinions on this sensitive matter...

As a girl and a gamer but also (I feel anyway) as a level headed, open minded person, I have a lot to say on this matter. It might not always make sense to you the reader but i feel it is something that needs to be shared. I want to stress that this is MY opinion and MY perceptions from MY experiences, I do not claim to speak for all the female gamers out there, they like me, have their own views.

Violence in games [editorial]

Every now and then the violence in games debate comes up, and almost miraculously it rears it's ugly head when a new GTA comes out. /sarcasm.

The usual contenders weigh in, 'games are art and should be free to explore violence' and the polar opposite 'games are turning our children into psychopaths'.

Car-booty Episode 6 - End of season

It's officially the end of summer.This is the end of car booting harvest, we have reached the point of the year when it's getting too wet and cold to sell outside.

Obvious winter joke is obvious

So what does this mean for us collectors? 

Prices are about to go up on eBay significantly due to the influx of weather shy sellers, re-sellers have hoovered up the bargains and are preparing to reap their rewards. Summer is a time for normal people to shift old crap ready for the winter months, and in turn winter is when we buy more stuff. Joe Blogs will order his nostalgia online and not simply stumble across it...

However...

This year we see 2 new games consoles come into the world. This means the arse is about to fall out of the previous 2 generations. 360 and PS3 games will plummet in price over the coming months and the generation that preceded them will fall to pennies. Possibly.

Car-booty Episode 5 - Aim for the head

George Romero is famous for his motion pictures depicting hordes of the long dead, and should I ever try to emulate his art form, I shall do so with Playstations instead of the walking deceased.

A good zombie flick starts with tension and anticipation, events slowly gain pace until the true gravity of the situation is upon the main protagonist... he/she is surrounded. Around every corner the funk of death is ever creeping closer... This weekend was certainly in keeping with the formula. The excitement and anticipation of the humongous car boots this weekend was met with hordes of unloved games...

My Playstation collection has been rapidly growing over the last month, and its with no effort on my part. 

Everywhere I turn there are armies of the un-played. The first generation Playstation kept Sony's first dabble in the console business going for a VERY long time, and as a net result, everyone and their Nanna's dog has one lurking in their cupboards/doghouse.

So why have they Risen from their dusty graves?

Car-booty Episode 4 - Rain, rain, go away.

The forecast for Car-booty this week - Shite.

After a wash out on Saturday I am sat watching Tim Minchin with my Wife and my Mother. Today really was never going to be about hunting bargains for 2 reasons, firstly my Mother is here and secondly I am as skint as a pikey before dole-money day.

The Sims & Me

I am writing this today on my new computer! Very exciting I know! But those among you with the same affliction as I will know all too well the mind numbing task that has befallen me - re-installing EVERY SINGLE ONE of my Sims 3 games!

Car-booty Episode 3: Oh great... more stuff

Let me start this episode with a confession... 

Its cool bro, Atari's kick ass.

My addiction to collecting old shite is still in full effect, however this doesn't mean the gaming has taken a back seat. Me and the wife played through Bioshock Infinite, had a huge Super Meat Boy session, and we're currently playing through Bioshock 2 for the 4th time.


Although having lots of quality time with my better half, I still managed to hoover up far too many games thanks to the Humble Bundle & weekly Humble sale... so now my Steam list has more games than I will ever have time to play (as if it needed more).

I can write that off in my head though, you'd be a plonker for turning down Dead Space 1 & 3, Burnout Paradise, Medal of Honour, Crysis 2, Mirrors Edge, Darwinia, Multiwinia, Uplink and Defcon for £1.34. TOTAL. Now I usually pay over the average so hold back the criticism for now, if I cheap out again you can slap me in the street - I would deserve it... Also any money to Charity and Developers is still money... SHUT UP!

Car-booty Episode 2: Winning!

What could I possibly have in common with Charlie Sheen?

• Successful career? ... Erm, No.
• Millions in the bank? ... definitely no.
• A blood stream full of chemicals? ... well - yes but not what I'm getting at.

My name is Anton MacArthur and I am an addict... I, like Charlie, am addicted to winning.

Week after week I find countless bargains at the various charity shops, pawn shops and car-boots. Every week I upload pictures of my finds, or chew my friends ears off and generally bask in awe at how amazing I am. 

I am Winning.

Also like Mr Sheen, I have an addiction. Addictions are terrible things, I should know as I have abused my body in ways over the years that is too depressing to go into on a gaming blog. I have beaten addictions before, normally by replacing them with other addictions...

Bargain hunting has all the traits of an addiction, chasing the next rush, finding sums of money when you NEED it even though your broke, and devoting more and more time to your 'buzz'.

http://www.drugabuse.gov

This weekend I snagged almost £150 worth of gear for less than £13. Winning. I also spent every penny I could scrape together and a good amount of my wife's 'bootin' money...

...that sounds more like addiction.

I realised I had a problem a little while ago, I sat back and looked at my collection one afternoon and realised with the exception of a few items, that I had not only managed to get 95% of my 'list' but also some stuff I had never dreamed of obtaining. 

• Never thought I would end up with M.U.S.H.A & Alien Soldier on the Megadrive.
• Never thought I would end up with Street Fighter Zero 3 on Saturn.
• Never thought I would end up with a Street Fighter Zero arcade cabinet 

... you get the idea.

Pictured £2.50

Pictured £9.50

So when did my desire to PLAY awesome games turn into just BUYING awesome games? 

I have no idea, but like Charlie Sheen I have devoted time and effort normally reserved for fun or relaxation into pursuing my rush or the means to do so. Having a room full of old shit is no way as rewarding as a room full of your buddies, talking trash and having a riot on whatever game your playing. Last week I filled my lounge full of mates and decided maybe the time had come...

Like all of my prior addictions however this one is slowly losing its power over me.

So how did this come about? Well, I started writing freelance and building a site/blog/Facebook the way I had always wanted to. I started mixing with more avid gamers and stopped trawling eBay every evening. I realised that it wasn't the games I loved or had feelings of nostalgia for - it was the people.

Does this mean I'll stop buying old games... hell no. Does it mean I'll think about playing the game with friends or reviewing at my leisure... certainly.

... that's enough for now bargain hunters, I have Chris coming round to play the arcade machine with me ;-)

Until next time.

~Anton

Car-booty Episode 1: Don't be a dick

If you follow our Facebook you'll know I love me some car-bootin', every weekend me and the family head out to trawl through other peoples junk in search of treasure. Most weekends will yield a fair harvest but sometime you strike out... its just the way things go...

In fact this article was originally going to be called 'Not another f***ing Playstation' as its the only console I consistently see at car-boots, however yesterday went along way to easing that frustration.

A little business 101...